Get Real !!!

Getting Real

Before any real changes can be made I need to 'Get Real' !!

What do I need to get real about ?? EVERYTHING !!

I need to come to terms with why I look the way I do and why I eat what I eat ! It is no use just deciding on this major surgery to help cure all my woes because it won't unless I get real and not only understand but come to terms with why I am here.

So why am I here ?? And where is 'here' anyway ?

HERE ?? Here is here and me now. I am currently OBESE, dreadfully overweight, yes ok I am FAT. It is very obvious but it is hard to admit. I am 165cm, so not overly tall, and this is accentuated by the fact that I am currently 138kg. Short and Fat, it makes me want to cry and I do ! But I just have to deal with it and Get Real. My current BMI is 50.7, so that makes me more than obese. Honestly it is terribly upsetting to write it down like that. These numbers seem to define who I am right now. There is a story behind these numbers and a story behind why these numbers are as they are.

WHY ?? Ok so there are many reasons why I am here and I will briefly talk about each of them. Some are possibly excuses and some may be real reasons.

I feel like "I have my reasons why" just like the Nickel Creek Song 'Reasons Why' but possibly they are just excuses ..... Let's see .....

I love this song. It is one which I sing in Violet Nights. I will talk about Violet Nights in another post.

Reasons Why or Just Excuses

1. I have a family history of obesity, especially on my mother's side of the family. My mum is large, but not huge like myself. Her mother was also quite big and many, many other members of the family were and are too. My cousin, who could be mistaken for my sister but looks alot more like my Mum than I do, would be considered obese as well, she is about the same size as I am but she is taller. So many overweight people say this is a reason and YES I do honestly believe that I am more genetically prone to being FAT but really it is only an excuse that I (and many others) use for being overweight.

2. I use food as a crutch. I do eat because of emotional reasons. I reach for food when I am happy, I reach for food when I am sad, when I am lonely, when I am upset, when I am stressed, etc, etc, etc. There are so many reasons why I eat. It has always been a way to celebrate the good things in life. But it also helps (sometimes) when I am feeling down, or sad, or upset. A tub of icecream whilst watching a good movie is a great thought and makes you feel better when you're in the middle of it but honestly when you finish you just feel worse than you did at the start because now there is the guilt because you've just polished off 1/2 a tub of icecream and are really feeling a bit ill.



3. Honestly I eat food because I like it !! I like the way if feels and I like the way it tastes !! This is really the main reason I eat more than I should or more of the wrong foods. This is where I have to 'Get Real' because I am the cause of my weight. I am the one who has put the food into my mouth and I a the one who swallowed it. I am the one who needs to make the decision to make it different and finally get healthy !!!

Why This TIME Will Be DIFFERENT

Now is the time to make the change and I am determined that this time will be different.I have tried all the diets, all the fads, all the exercises and I've popped my fair share of pills.

I've Tried It ALL !!

I know like so many others struggling with their weight I have tried so many different ways to loose my excess weight.

Diets I've tried:

* Weight Watches

* Calorie Counting

* Sure Slim

* Meal Replacements: Herbalife

* Lite 'n Easy

Pills I've taken:

*Xenical

*Reductil

*Duromine

So 'yes' I have tried many different ways to loose weight and 'yes' I have had some success to varying degrees BUT I have always put back on MORE weight than I lost !! So now I find myself larger than I have EVER been.

Different Approach

I am determined to find an approach that is going to last a lifetime. I am determined to find a way which will help me not only loose weight but to also keep it off !! I think I have found this with the Gastric Sleeve procedure !! And let me tell you that I can't wait !! I am excited !!

Till Next Time,

Cheers,

L :)