There Always Has To Be A Beginning ....

A beginning or at least a new beginning .... of sorts ....

I find myself in a place that 15 years ago I could have never even imagined. I have 3 beautiful children and am engaged to the man of my dreams.

I am happier now than I have ever been in my entire life. My finance and I are a perfect match, we even each other out and share our love and our passions. Our love for each other holds us strong and our passion for our family and our music sets us on solid rock.

My new beginning was finding the love of my life, my soul mate, after many many years of abuse and turmoil. So this is where I will start, today, with a bright and happy future ahead of me. And although my past is what has made me the person I am today I am leaving the darkness behind me, learning from my actions and building my future with my man and our family.

So who am I ? I am Liesel. A mother. A partner. A lover. A musician. An educator. And although this is what I see as who I am most others cannot see past my exterior, most judge me by what I look like and this is something I have battled my whole life. So OK then, I need to add another descriptor of who I am .... An overweight female.

This is me.

Although I have battled my weight demons my whole life and have faced the harsh words of others who do not know the battle I have fought and although this is not what has brought me to the place I am right now it is certainly a contributing factor.

My weight issues have and are causing issues with my body and my health. This is what I am now fighting. 

It seems that after a few falls at work over the last couple of years, I have also damaged my back and have 2 bulging discs and some arthritis build-up in my lower back. It is my weight now which is hindering my recovery and in fact making it worse. At times the pain is so very overwhelming and the pain killers I am taking do not even dull the pain I am experiencing.

So what am I going to do about it ?!?! 

It is no use sitting here and and complaining about things if I am not prepared to put in the hard work to make it better.

I, like so many others before me have methodically worked through the various weight loss programs, diets, fads, shakes, pills .... on and on .... and have had limited success but always ending up putting the weight back on and eventually looking and feeling as I do now.

So now is the time for drastic changes.

I have spent hours deliberating over the few options I have left. These options I am facing are now surgical.

I decided to sit down with a friend who has a gastric band. We talked for hours about how it has changed her life and how she went from a woman who weighted well over 230kg to now fitting into size 14 clothes and feeling awesome that she is able to actually buy clothes from a "normal" clothing shop. 

After all of the talking and thinking I decided to speak with my fiance about this idea. We (and I say we because this is a team effort and he is supporting me the whole way) decided to go and talk with my doctor about this and she referred me to Dr Roy Brancatisano from Circle of Care in Baulkum Hills.

When I rang to make an appointment the receptionist told me that she would email me all of the information that I would need to help me understand the procedures which are available to me. I read all about the band thinking that this was the right option for me as it is now quite easily reversed and removed.

I opened the document on the Gastric Sleeve (not actually knowing anything about the procedure) and the first line said, "this procedure is not reversible", so I closed the document and thought nothing more of it. A week or so later I decided to have another look at the documentation that was sent through and I decided to read about the Gastric Sleeve. As I read a light bulb turned on !!

THIS is the option for me !! It makes so much sense ! Drastic ?!? Hell YES ! But absolutely necessary ! I want to be fit and healthy when I get married next year AND I want to be alive when my babies get married and have babies of their own !!

So I now have an appointment with the Dr on 6th September, 2012. I can't wait !! 

L